Long Time, No Post

If anyone gives a hoot, I`m awfully sorry for not posting sooner. Things have changed much here at Damnfarm in this past year. The crops never came in this past summer as Buster and I had hoped. We planted our weed in April as we always do, watered them, clipped the buds, weeded, and hid them from the helicopters flying overhead. Early on it was looking like it was going to be a bumper crop, so in July Buster thought it would be a good opportunity to take a couple of weeks off and go to Europe again. Seven years ago, long before we had made our mark and became famous in the blogging world, we visited France and Germany on a shoestring. When we were in Paris Buster caught and ate a mouse and to this day refers to it as French food, but I, and I alone know he was disappointed. Everyone knows, French food always sounds better than it is, it matters not how "mouse" translates it`s still a small rodent, no matter how much gravy you roll it around in.
Buster, put up his half of the farm, got a $25000.00 loan. I was out in the fields pinching off some buds, I first heard the horn,turned to see the limo with Buster protruding from the moonroof,both pawls overhead, meowing at the top of his lungs. I retrived my bandana from my back pocket, my favorite red one,mopped the sweat from my forehead and began to make my way to the farmhouse.
The chaufeur,a black cat opened the side door, bowed from the waist,Buster, a orange cat stepped out grinning that grin that cats sometimes do. Buster pressed a $50 in the drivers left pawl and said something I couldn`t make out. The chaufeur produced one of those lint rollers and went to work on the seats in the limo,as you can imagine the inside of that limo was covered with cat fur,both orange and black.
I couldn`t help but to grin too, give Buster a side pat and a head rub. Buster says lets go in, he lead the way as he often does

The Third Person

One would think that after all this time,all these posts,that the WVMan could just hammer one of these things out at will. Not so,this is the WVMans third attempt in as many days. Should you be reading this you will know that the WVMan found a way. The artistic side of the WVMan says "just do it",the medicated side says"don`t do it",the horndog side says"do it the babes love it",Buster says"do what you have to do,just don`t interfear with my blogging income". The WVMan mulled all this over and was about to launch into the best blog post that the fans have ever read when Buster chimed in"Stop it Bozo,just stop it, writing in the third person like that irritates people". Well needless to say the WVMan was taken aback,somewhat,the WVMan didn`t think Buster read anything the WVMan wrote. The WVMan was somewhat irritated"Buster who the hell do you think has been putting the Friskies in the bowl,Shakespere." After Buster and the WVMan cooled down a bit, the WVMan says to Buster"Look,Pal,when the WVMan writes in the third person the fans eat it up". Buster licked his front paw and looked up and said"Bullshit". Anyhow,anyway the WVMan lost his train of thought after that,but rest assured it would have been the finest blogpost ever.......Pitiful isn`t it. The WVMan has just flushed the Pulitzer Prize right down the toilet

Feline Corps

I have neglected the fans for so long now that I don`t know if I will recieve help or not! Those poor, poor pitiful few that are left please help me convince Buster to give up his dreams of joining the Feline Corps. As I have recently learned Busters Great, great,great,great,great,great,great, great grandfather served in the Feline Corps during the VietNam war. Commonly known as the "First Great Corporate Profit Conflict". Buster and I have been looking into this for years and didn`t want to release this to our fans until we could be confident that we had expored every avenue open to us. Heres` what we have been able to gleen from the records of DOD, CIA, NSA, and other war-mongering agencies. The Feline Corps was established in 1942, under Presidential Directive "Save General Motors" signed by then President Roosevelt, April 1, 1942. Very little has been reported over the years about the contribution the Feline Corps made to the defeat of the Nazis(Corporate Dominated Germany). It was the greatest victory in the history of the world for human rights, for it was the ordinary man that rose up world-wide to defeat facsism(corporate domination). His name was Bruno and from what the records all show he was Winston Churchills personal kitty cat from 1942-1945. After the war he returned to the states and fathered several litters of cute kittens, and began a long line of heroic tomcats of witch Buster is the latest. We have not been able to confirm this but it was reported in several big city newspapers of the time that Bruno was with Ira Hayes(Indian War Hero) when he died, papers from that time speculate that Bruno had been Ira`s kitty cat.
The role played by the Feline Corps during the VietNam profit seeking war was "top secret" then and still is to this day. Here`s what we`ve been able to confirm, his name was Spike, he had golden fur, weighted 15 lbs, when drafted. He was awarded the "TopCat" metal at the completion of "Feline Advanced Training" at Lackland AFB in 1967. We were able to pickup his trail again in 1969, DOD records show he was in VietNam in May of that year, his handler at that time was a M.Mann, later documents have his handler as M. Mahn. We have been unable to locate any information about Spike after that time, we can only assume that he was lost during the great rise of the stock market in 1971. Gone but never forgotten, he fathered a litter of adorable kittens on a weekend pass in San Antonio the night before he shipped out for the great profit conflict. Buster traces his roots back to that litter, he`s awfully proud of his anscesters, and who can blame him for that? Problem is he thinks he should enlist in the Feline Corps to carry on the family tradition. We both know he`d be sent straight to Irac where he could fight for the freedom of Exxon/Mobile, BP, GE,Raython, all the big banks, the world trade organization, big money of the world to dominate the flow of oil from the region. Buster asked me"Bozo, won`t the people of Irac be better off". I had to concede that ,yes they would be if any were left alive. Buster only showed that smile that cats sometimes show. I was a little taken aback by how much he looked like Dick Chainey at that moment, I shook my head, shut my eyes, when I opened them again he was just loveable ole Buster again. It made me think though, imagine Dick and Lynn in bed, Dick says just a sec hon, as he calls over to the Whitehouse. George and Laura are in bed, George picks up the phone. 'Hello Mr President(gufaws,gufaws) how many deaths in Irac today"? George" Only 379 today, are you and Lynn getting it on again? Dick"Yeah, I`m gonna` put you on the speaker, 379 today honey, what`s the body count in Afganistan"? George"Damnit Dick I've forgotten, I can patch you into Gen Patrais, he`d probably have those numbers, do you need them tonight"? Dick"Goddamnit George, yes I need them (thats it babe, keep doin it just like that, we`ll get the total body count in a sec") right now".Gen Patrais" Dick, you`re gonna love this, but first when I get out of the Army could you hook me up with a position in your scab company, Halliburtin or Brown&Root? Lynn " General your vice president job is waiting, now give us the body count, I can`t rock on this all night long" Gen Patrais " Keep rockin Lynn, I`m getting those numbers out of my briefcase now". 'Ready Dick....119 dead, 78 wounded'' Dick "Dammit Lynn get off me, thats only 498 dead, you know I can`t get off unless the count is over 500" There it is, if I can keep Buster from enlisting in the Feline Corps I`m going to, if you have a tom thinking of this, do what you think you should, but make no mistake this war has nothing to do with defending our country and never did. Buster and I have discussed this over Friskys and Coors several times over the last 5 years, next wednesday will be the 5th year of this countries occupation of Irac, it`s saddens me to think that the country that Spike, Buuno, M.Mahn, and the WVMan defended has come to this, the 4 of us served out of love for our country. To have our might and wealth commandered by Exxon/Mobile, our rights as citizens trampled on, and even the Magna Carta abolished, not since the 13th century has any nation declared the Magna Carta invalid. That how low we`ve sunk, worst of all, remember that thing called freedom of the press, it too is being trampled on, not by big government but by big corporations, GE owns NBC, Disney owns ABC, Murdock FOX, CBS. Nothing gets airtime that doesn`t profit their shareholders. What we are seeing in this country today is Capitalism run amuck, everything for sale to the highest bidder. Nothing is immune, our representives we send to congress, our presidents, hellsfire even our votes. Even Buster agrees with me about big media, we the people must regain control of the media or lose all our rights. It`s not for me, it`s for your kids, grandkids and the princible of the thing that ticks me off. My generation being responsible for this just doesn`t sit well with me, we were the Baby Boomers. The only generation looked upon , not as citizens but consummers, well I take exception to that label. I am a citizen, so is Buster. Buster still can`t vote, it`s one thing to get Buster a Social Security number and another to have him come in for a photograph. I strongly suggest that you too keep your loved ones out of this occupation. I have to go feed the chickens and slop the hogs but I`ll be back soon. Oh,almost forgot Buster says hey...

We`re Backkkkkkk!

It`s been a while,hope all of you missed us. We have missed you! I know that I declared the blog dead, and now I bring it back to life. Don`t get your panties in a wad, when I killed it, I really meant it and besides you have all accepted the WVMan as your personal blogger and knew that I possess the power to not only create blogs, but to raise them from the dead as well. With that out of the way, I`ll get right to the reason we have returned to the net. It`s these *#&damned Republicants`and their refusal to face the reality that they are not fit to govern our country or Iracs` either. What were they thinking when they lied to us, then started this illegal war. Any right thinking person knows that any endevor that begins with a lie is going to be doomed from the start and not only that, these evil bastards had it in their hearts to steal Iracs` oil from the very beginning. So here we are mired in a conflict that has gotten some 4000 of our soldiers killed, countless Iracies killed or displaced, drained the treasury, divided the populace and have destroyed our credibility around the world. Disgracful. Well Buster and I are mad as hell and we`re not going to take it anymore. We have joined with moveon.org and we are going to exercise our freedom of speech while we still have it. You too can click on moveon.org and let your voice be heard, it`s free. You can contribute to the cause if you want, the WVMan has but Buster has yet to ante up a dime of his blogging royalties. He spends all his money on fake mice and those little balls with the bell inside, I guess it`s his business( I can never remember how to spell business, so went to the dictionary and what caught my eye"bush league" meaning "second-rate minor league"isn`t that odd?) but you don`t have to be like Buster. We must take our country back or lose it forever, I know you`ve all heard it" we`ve got the best government that money can buy" and it can get a chuckle in most circles but its`gotten to the point that nothings humorous about this government anymore. Our constitution begins with "we the people" not "we the people with the most money." Awaken my fellow countrymen(and ladies too). WVMan blog has a few new features, videos will be posted and more links to other organizations as well. Hope you all can tolerate the growing pains as we finally migrate from Beta to the all new and improved WVMan 2.0. So long for now,we`ll meet up again soon.

STRENGTH THROUGH PEACE
KUCINICH IN `08

Travel Trailer

Buster and I were out all afternoon shopping for pet carriers or as Buster refers to them" travel trailers". I want to take just a short time-out to clue the fans,never ever take a cat shopping for pet carriers. We were out for lunch at Long John Silvers, Buster had the fish`n more combo, I had the seafood platter. It was just another day for us, or so I thought. Buster had just finished preening, as he does after every meal, and was about ready to hop into his "travel trailer" when this lady walked in with her tabby cat in the latest model Windstream cat carrier. Well needless to say, the rest of the afternoon was spent going from one lot to another, I wanted to get back to Damnfarm and get a catnap but Buster was hellbent on swapping in his "travel trailer"on a new one. Buster finally worked out a deal on a `07 Gulfstream, it`s one great looking pet carrier and has all the options, handle on top, door on front, 25% more air vents than the 2006 models. I thought Buster got burned on the deal, but I was just to tired to care at that point. He swapped in his `04 Dutchman that I had bought for him back before we became famous bloggers. I have to admit a tear came to my eye on the ride back to Damnfarm without it in tow. Buster was happy though and next to the fans that`s what matters most. Don`t nobody don`t care if WVMan is happy...

The Jimmy Solution

June 10,2007 this blog will be 2 years old, I regret to say that on that date the WVMan blog will no longer exist. I have some 50 readers out there in the cyber world, but few comments on the posts and most comment annomously. What do the fans fear? I`ve rolled this around inside my head, around and around, the only possible explaination is the fans fear Buster. He`s just a cat people.
Anywho, without some feedback I can no longer do this, it`s all about the fans and always has been. I had hoped that the fans would connect with one another, discuss the latest post or the latest turn of events. It just hasn`t worked out that way and I`m sure it`s something I`ve done, I`ve seen blogs with lots of interaction that were not nearly as fun and intelegent as WVMan or as caring and loving as Busters`blog.
Life will go on, and now I`ve decided to become a famous writer, I mean, what else could one do after being a famous blogger. I have written about half of my first novel, it still has no clear plot, and the characters have no real definition but I am hopeful for publication for the holidays in the fall. The Jimmy Solution.

WVMan Enterprizes

Some of the fans have expressed their concern that the WVMan blog is no longer addressing their basic human needs. In the spirit of including everyone, Buster and I want each and every fan to feel free to express her or himself in the comments section and those too shy for that may send email. I will keep your personal info confidential, however Buster sells every scrap of information he can get his paws on.
We here at WVMan Enterprizes, do our best to fulfill the need of our fans for the absurd, ironic, and loonicy that they lack in their pathetic day to day lives. While we`re not yet as big as Google or Yahoo, we feel that we still have a lot to offer to the above average bozo or bozette. We continue to offer all this in our Basic Package, however if you would like a really good screwing, you can sign up for our Premium service. Just click on WVMan, Overcharge Division. Operators are standing by.

In a Quandry?

Hello Fans, I am in the throws of the worst blogging block the WVMan has ever had to endure. It may be the cheap vodka that is causing this abnormality, the jury is still out on that one. Whatever the case I have been unable to find a subject for this post, yet, my desire to please the fans compells me to offer this explaination. Some years ago, when Scotch Whiskey was my drink of choice, bloggers block wasn`t even on the agenda, then as the Jim Beam period came, puntuated of course by the Tequila disaster, post subjects were a dime a dozen. Buster trys to help and I appreciate it but I have to be realistic and at the same time not offend Buster and yet keep the sensibilites of the fans at the for-front. Had I known I would have to walk a tightrope like this I would have never gotten myself so deeply involved in this cyberworld. The pressure to please the fans on the one hand and Buster wanting posts about fake mice and those little balls with the bell inside on the other has the WVMan in a quandry. This may be the last post from the WVMan, when this all started it was a quest to use "quandry" in a sentence. I have to go now, it`s time for my meds.

In the Beginning

Many of you have expressed an interest in how Buster and I got into blogging. I can`t speak for Buster, but as for myself I don`t mind a bit sharing . When I first decided to become a famous blogger, I knew it wouldn`t be easy. First thing I did was purchase a `fridge with an ice maker, I instintively knew I wouldn`t be able to focus on my goal if I had to frett over filling up ice trays. Then I bought a case of quarts of Jim Beam. Got myself a real comfortable computer chair. Gave Buster some warm milk and made myself a cocktail, logged on and got relaxed, I guess I sat there for about 3 or 7 days. It was a trying period for Buster and I, I was so focused on becoming a famous blogger that I neglected to fill Busters`bowl. As you may imagine he was somewhat dismayed at this turn of events. It was then that Buster jumped up on the table and walked across the keyboard and it spelled out "Inthebeginning". It was like a spotlight shown upon WVMan blog, for the next 6 days I hammered tirelessly at the keyboard and the Beam, creating one awesome post after another. On the 7th day I had a killer hangover and rested that day, but it didn`t matter the WVMan blog was on-line and the world over fans were clicking on. Several of the devoted have become full-fledged deciples, and have linked their blogs to WVMan. For your chance to win a playstation 3 accept WVMan as your personal blogger, today.

What a Blast

Sorry to be so late with our New Year post. We know the fans like to be kept up to snuff, especially on the holidays. The holdup was that I didn`t get bailed out until 1:00 this afternoon and Busters` over at the pound and I can`t get him out until tomorrow morning.
It all started on New Years Eve, Buster and I were kicked back watching football games. I guess I had drank 5 or 9 of those Silver Bullets and Buster had been huffing on an ounce of catnip, when he got an IM from some cat on the other side of town. He came trotting out of the computer room and let me know we were invited to a large New Years party. I thought right then that this was not a good idea, but Buster was so excited about it that I couldn`t say no. I said
"OK pal" and knocked out the Silver Bullet I had opened. While Buster preened, I shaved and ran a comb through my fur/hair I meant to say. Buster wanted to take the "Cougar" so I went out and got the ole Mercury fired up. Buster came running and jumped in and we headed across town.
It was the damnest party I`ve ever attended, soon as we walked in a Bud light was slapped in my hand and Buster had half a bag of catnip tied around his neck. We scoped the place out, there must have been about 50 cats there and 30 humans owned by them. Buster said he was going to go mingle and I didn`t see him again till way after the New Year rang in.
I found myself a spot near the keg and checked out the ladies. I had never been to a party quite like that before, all the girls were so friendly to me and touched my arms and hands, and talked to me like they had known me all their lives. Several even kissed me on the cheek. Well let me tell you I was on top of the world for about 10 minutes, then I saw what the deal was. There were maybe 10 other men there with their cats and reality hit home, I was at a gay New Years Eve party and the babes were fag-hags. I thought to myself "Man you`ve gotta` get yourself a dog". I worked over that keg and waited for Buster.He showed up next year. I picked him up and put him in the back seat of the Cougar. We headed back across town, we were about a half mile from Damnfarm when we ran right upon one of those DUI check road blocks. I was cool as a cucumber when I gave the deputy my drivers license and registration. He looked them over and asked what I was doing out on the road so late. I told him I had been over at the hospital with my dying mother and was headed home to get some sleep. It was very pitiful sounding and he bought it hook, line and sinker. Then he stuck his hand in the Cougar to give my papers back to me . That`s when Buster came out of the back seat and bit a chunk out of his arm about the size of a quarter. He screamed and shook Buster off, needless to say, there was blood and cat fur on all three of us and the Cougar. The other deputies on the seen came running to the aide of their bleeding comrade with pistols drawn. Shortly there after I was hand cuffed and in the back seat of a police car. They had Buster cornered in the back of the Cougar, he was wound tight as a banjo string from all the catnip. His ears were laid back and the fur on his back was standing straight up, bloody fangs bared, and blowing a warning that could be heard loud and clear. It was a stand off till an animal control officer arrived and shot Buster with one of those darts and knocked him out long enough to get him in a cage. By 3 AM I was in jail and Buster in the Pound. All in all it was a fun New Years Eve for Buster and I, hope the fans had a great New Years Eve,also. I wish you all a happy New Year and that goes double from Buster.

Christmas at Damnfarm

Buster and I stayed up last night waiting for Santa. He finally arrived at about 3AM, Buster was very excited to see him. He brought Buster one of those large bags of Friskies, some new fake mice, and 5 of those little balls with a bell inside. He didn`t bring me anything. Santa and I did a couple of shots of Jim Beam and he explained that you have to be good or he can`t bring you anything. He said he was sorry, but that it was the rules. I told him I would try to be good next year. He looked right at me and laughed "Ho Ho Ho" and hammered down another shot of Beam. He picked up his bag and said he had to "shake a leg", he had lots of stops to make. Buster didn`t want him to go and rubbed his legs and purred. He patted Buster on the head and told him he`d be back next year. He had cat hair all over his red outfit by the time he got on his way. As for me, I was happy to hear the sound of those sleigh bells as the raindeer took him onto his next stop. It was clear to me that a 'half gallon of Jim Beam' wasn`t going to last very long with him around.The WVMan and Buster wish everyone a merry Christmas.

Mind Thangy Dangey

I want so much to post fun stories like I used to, but nothing will come but the serious side of me. Oh yes, the WVMan has a serious side. The WVMan`s personna is not 2 sided, but more like 8 sided. One of those is the serious side, the fans are not to make too much of this transitional period, bare in mind that new medications need time to work. Look on the bright side as I do, bound to be great posts arise from this experiment.

Thanksgiving Post

Hello faithful readers, first off I`d best appoligize for those political posts. They`ve been deleted , they have no place in WVMan or Busters`blog. This blog is only intended to keep the fans up to date on the adventures of Bill & Buster, political blogs are a dime a dozen on the net. The team here at WVMan Enterprizes has been re-focused, and have vowed to keep our eyes on the ball in the future. Thanks for your patience.
Much has happened since my last post, Buster and I took a short trip over to Nags Head just to get away for a day or two. Being famous bloggers takes it`s toll on both of us. The e-mail alone keeps the entire staff busy, the requests for autographed photos has become over-whelming and the holiday rush is just around the corner. We had intended to spend a week there, but Buster went out for Friskies and Bud Lights and was recognized on our forth day so we cut the trip short and arrived back at Damnfarm somewhat refreshed. We`d like to thank the fans at Nags Head who respected our privacy, those that didn`t " you know who you are" , we appreciate your enthusiasum but try to understand that Buster and I must unwind now and then. Stop and think. If I let everyone in North Carolina give Buster a head rub he`d be as bald on top as the WVMan. No one wants that!!
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day, the staff has been given the week-end off. While the WVMan don`t have any plans, Busters` having some of his cat friends over. The weather is supposed to be nice for this time of year, the get together will be out back. I`m cooking turkey and will have to DJ again. Everyday is thanksgiving day for everyone here at Damnfarm, we have so much to be thankful for, mostly our fans, without whom this blog would not be possible. That, having been said, we want to wish everyone a happy thanksgiving holiday.

Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?

The WVMan has been thinking about how to write this post for 3 months. As I struggle to find the words that can define my feelings, I realize that I`m only good at writing crap. I have an empty place in my heart that I will live with the rest of my days. My best friend of some 40 years has gone, and I can`t quite wrap my mind around the thought.
Come aboard the "WayBack Machine" with me and you`ll learn about when there was three; John, Tom, and Bill , common names but an uncommon trio. John from Boston, Tommy from Manhattan, and Bill from Long Branch, WVa. We were tight back then `65 `66 , US Air Force buddies. We did everything together, that 19-20 year old service boys do. Much of it what I would now call mischevious and there is where John Haley shined, Tommy and I just along for the ride. I can`t be more specific as the statute of limitations may not be up on those deeds.
We had girlfriends, that we dated when we were off duty. Tommy and Meridith, John and Mary ( not a heavenly match ) and my Phyllis McLay. We went to the beach together, movies, bars, the South Florida tourist traps, Monkey Jungle, the Serpentarium, the Planetarium , Gooney Golf and bowling. Looking back, it was clearly the most fun I ever had with my clothes on. Dear readers please grant me forgivness for these stolen words, a time to sow, a time to reap....a time for war, a time for peace....a time for love, a time for hate. Our time too, came and went as all things do. I`m saddened that I can`t recall the last time we were all together. As it turned out, Mary got pregnant and John married her because he felt obligated. John was like that, the most happy go lucky, irreverent, and irresponsible guy in the bunch. But whenever the shit hit the fan Haley would standup and take responsibility and try to set things right, he did that his whole life and it almost never worked out, it most certainly didn`t with Mary. She didn`t want to be loved and the more John tried the more she pulled away. Tommy Hathaway and I were/are alike in that when the shit hit the fan, we`d get as far from the fan as possible. More than once in those 40 years John let me know he didn`t approve of my behavior. I`d just laugh and he`d eventually get over it.
We stayed in touch and he came to WVa to visit and I went to Boston a few times. He got a charge out of the way we talk, and likewise I too got a charge out of being in a place where everyone sounded like JFK. John visited Damfarm in the summer of `04 or `05 I can`t remember which, Buster took a liking to him right away , as they got to know each other they came to see how much they had in common. They both liked seafood, chicken, bunnies, and pussys. Not to mention, the yawning and streching after a nice lunch and a nap. By the third day they were out back spraying trees and shrubs together.
With many stories left untold..... anything close to a real tribute beyond my talents, this blogpost too must end. A time to be born....a time to die. John S. Haley 1947-2005

WARNING

It has recently come to the attention of our legal team that several attempts have been made to plagerize WVMan and Busters blog sites. Investigations are ongoing, but rest assured the purps will be brought to justice and if thats not possible then justice shall be brought to them. That said, on advice of our staff and to the extreme sadness of Buster and I, we must post this disclaimer.
All letters, numbers, puntuation, words, sentences, paragraphs, story lines and the blanks between words are the intellectual property Bill and Buster. Those who are using any of these in your blogs or E-Mail are ordered to cease and desist immediately. Any unarthorized use, reproduction, rebroadcast without the express written permission of the NFL and Major League Baseball is strictly prohibited or you can contact Buster to obtain a "waiver of damages" form to avoid charges on past transgressions. As and here to fore, to take advantage of this moratorium an account must be established. We here at WVMan Enterprizes, Overcharge Division accept all major credit cards or PayPal.
Charges will be assessed as follows; consonants at 2.5 cents, Vowels at 5 cents, numbers at 7 cents, zeros no charge, sentences at 25 cents, paragraphs 2 dollars, blanks between words 10 cents, punctuatation marks 1 cent, storylines $5000.00. Prices subject to change without notice.
Thank You for your Co-operation

Busters`Home

Hello faithful readers, glad you`re back, can`t say the same for Buster though. He got back from Vegas last night, flat broke. I got the message at 2AM, he needed a ride from the airport, didn`t even have cab money. He wouldn`t have got back at all but he had a round trip ticket. Then to top that off I had to take him to the vet this morning. Seems he contracted a cat STD, the vet called it the Kitty Cat Clap. He`d howl to the top of his lungs with every tree spayed. It`s obvious that he`d been hitting the catnip pretty hard again and who knows what else. It`s also come to my attention that he let a lot of our fans down, many went to Vegas hoping to get a picture with Buster. Hope the fans can understand that this addictive behavior is part of why they loved him from the start. It all stems from, and this may be construed by some as just "Barstool Philosophy", his kittenhood. He was born into a rather large family, 7 brothers and 2 sisters and was seperated from them and his mother when he was just 10 days old and never knew the tomcat that fathered him at all. Then the ball and claw removal, all those things together have wrought havic from within. His actions, even here at Damnfarm, can become pretty erratic at times. Were he human I`m sure he`d be considered bi-polar.
On a lighter note, the WVMan has been to Durham VA medical center since my last post. Two more stints installed, I`m pumping WV blood like an 18 year old. Soon as I get my legs and mind repaired I`ll be like brand new. The VA and I are shooting for immortality, but for the moment the WVMan is "Honky Tonk Disabled". Have you got your WVMan Lives bumper sticker?

Fluoxitine Post

Before I begin this post let me first offer my appoligies to all who wasted 5 minutes of their lives reading the ill concieved Gin Post. The email was overwhelmingly negative and too numerous to answer individually. I want to make it clear to the fans that Buster had nothing to do with it, the WVMan accepts full responsibility and vows that there will never be another Gin post in this blog.
Buster informed me last night that he`s going out to Vegas without me next week and he might not be coming back. He`s as ticked off as everyone else about the Gin post. I told him how much I regretted the entire incident but he has yet to forgive me. Where`s the love guys?
I went to the nervous clinic today for my nervous appointment with my phycologist and she suggested that I just put it behind me and move on.
" What`s done is done" she said " If we dwell on the past, we can`t enjoy the present, nor plan a brighter future." She is intelligent and easy on the eyes as well, a rare combination. The WVMan is infatuated like a school boy. She sometimes asks between the "and how does that make you feel"s, what would your life be like if you could magically change anything? And all the WVMan can think of is getting off the couch and taking her with me out of the nervous clinic for a week in New York of Broadway shows, elaborate dinners, very expensive shopping on 5th avenue and visiting the United Nations building, where of course, on behalf of Buster and the fans I would address the delegates from around the world with our plan for peace the world over. Seeing all the delegates hit themselves on the forehead with the heel of their hand, and say in unison"Why didn`t I think of that"? and by the time Elizabeth and I boarded the Red-Eye for Paris around the globe plans were already being made to recycle all the weapons into farming implements.
After dinner that evening, with stars twinkling behind the Eifel Tower and the French wine tickling our senses, she`d gaze into my eyes and tell me how much she loves the WVMan blog.....................and out in Vegas, Buster with his bucket of quarters has no idea that he`s about to hit the jackpot!

Gin Post

This post will be the first that WVMan has concieved with Gin riding shotgun. Tighten those seatbelts, neither myself nor Buster knows where this is headed.
Before we get underway, Buster has asked that I pass on to his fans his deepest gratitude for the thousands of cards and emails. I too would like to offer my thanks. To see him read those letters and swish his tale gives both myself and his vet hope for a full recovery. Now and then, mostly when I lay down to sleep I question myself if maybe I pushed him into this blogging world, he was as happy as a pig in mud at first. Maybe it was just too fast, his rapid rise to the pinancle of the blogispere, I can only guess at the pressure he`s under. Thank God the WVMan will never have to go through that, blogging mediocrity, my credo.
Moving on........why gin WVMan? Everyone enjoys the posts with Jim Beam at the helm, why this abboration? OK here`s the deal, there was a half gallon of gin left over from the 4th of Busters birthday party. It`s just going to go bad, and I was a bit curious to see what a gin post would look like. Buster expressed his concern as well, worried that I might make him look bad, what with our blogs linked so closely together and all. I wish everyone would just chill out, I`m gonna do it anywho.
Damn, now yall`ve made me lose my train of thought. This post was on the verge of greatness, now i`ve got writers block. Not a thing in there to put on the page. This is so strikingly simular to the block I was afflicted with back in `03 after the shock therapy that wiped out the 80`s but brought hi-def and vivid color to the 60`s. The staff at the nervous hospital was entertained, yet taken aback by the memory I had of the 60`s. I told them of my exploits from that time, and afterwards many were in treatment themselves in the quest to separate my stories from their own memories. Some have asked don`t you feel incomplete not being able to recall an entire decade, that`s when I just say" it was the Regan years" and I see the envy on their faces.
It`s been rumored that thousands wiped out much of their lives in `04 after Bush was re-elected trying to electro-shock their loved ones and themselves in an effort to rid themselves of the decade of the 0`s. What the hell does one call a decade with all those 0`s in it, the 10`s don`t feel right to me, after all theres nine 0`s and only one 10. Then there`s the matter of the double 0 ,no ones claiming it.......................After a brief sidebar with Buster it will henceforth be known as "the o`s". MAN LAW.
I`ll be right back.

Accuratron Watch

Back in `60s, yes the WVMan is that old, long before I hooked up with Buster and became the famous blogging duo that we are today, I had another life. I and my fellow Air Policemen were all that stood between those doggone Ruskies and the free world. While we didn`t pilot the bombers, our mission was to see that they got airborne without interference from any enemy and we did that. I served with many patriots during that time. Yes it was when the Vietnam war was heating up, it got all of the attention and rightly so, but in the back ground, nearly invisible to the public were the brave men of the 19th Combat Defense Squadron, most notably the men of "B" flight. The cream of the crop as they say and the WVMan was proud to serve with such dedicated Air Policemen, heros
to a man. We would have gladly given our lives for this great country,we were trained for one purpose to see the bombers in the air and for those who don`t know what the payload was, lets`just say H-bomb.
I hate to sound like Readers Digest but during that time that I met the most unforgetable character of my life. Within "B" flight he was known as Hud, to the enemy as AB, a designation reserved for the most brutal. Many may be repulsed by his tactics but none can deny the effectivness .Some say he was born with it, others argue that the 19th made him that way, myself I think it was a little of both but today it`s a course taught at the Air Force Academy and yet a subject of debate within the mental health community.
I came to know him in the fall of 64, I`ll never forget the day he shipped in, so many treated him like the bumling idiot that he appeared to be but I saw right through that act and we became fast friends. As time went by we became a commie fighting team, not once on our watch was perimenter 4 breached. While they don`t award metals for that Hud and I are proud all the same. This would be a very different world without the extrodinary courage of this man, that they now call reverend.
Back in those days he had a Accuratron watch, I wonder if anyone knows where it is today. I saw it several times, though he never let me touch it. It had near magical powers, time could be told day or night with it.
I know many of you are thinking, what`s that mean. Well I`m going to lay this out for you this one time and it won`t be discussed any further, at least not in this blog. Here it is,"60`s time" was different than time is now. If you don`t believe me "look it up".
It`s been rumored that it`s being kept at the pentagon but officials will neither confirm nor deny. I suspect that we will never know and in many ways it doesn`t matter, just the fact that Hud came back to the swing shift with it on his wrist speaks volumes.
as always
Dedicated and Vigilant

Busters` Birthday

Those of you who follow our blogs know that Busters` birthday was July 4th. He had his party on the patio outback. About 25 of his cat friends showed up for the bash, `bout every kind and color of cat attended. It got started at about 3 in the afternoon, seems a lot of his buddies like to sleep late. Buster drafted me to set up the keg and do the grilling. The chicken seemed to be the most popular dish, I can grill pretty good chicken, most all agreed.
I started cleaning up the grill at about 5 o`clock, before I could finish there were cats lying about napping all over the patio. I was glad to get the grilling out of the way and went inside to have a couple gin and tonics. The traditional Independence Day cocktail here at Damnfarm.
They started to stir again after about 45 minutes, yawning and stretching becoming fully awake. I left Buster and them alone and watched TV, they played games, Buster had his fake mice and those balls with the bell inside out there. They all seemed to be having a good time, then at dusk I heard screeching and went to the door to check on them. Several fights had broken out, I never did find out what the disagreements were about, I was about to break up the combatants when Buster stopped me. He said it was all part of the fun. I said "Buster it`s your party." and went back in for another gin n tonic.
I switched on the lights out back and got the outdoor speakers ready and settled in to be DJ for the evening. Some of the neighbors were putting off fireworks, it was quite a touching site to see them lined up out there listening to the Rolling Stones and watching the fireworks. Buster was having a great time.
I`m going to share a secret, no one ever tell Buster. Promise?
Buster knows squat about American history and thinks all the celebration is about his birthday. He enjoys it all so much that I haven`t had the heart to tell him any different. I found out about this last 4th of July while we were in Chicago at a blogger convention. I had the limo driver take us to the lake shore that night, we had watched the fireworks display for about 5 minutes when Buster leaned over and asked how they knew it was his birthday in Chicago. I told him that not just in Chicago but all around the country his birthday was being celebrated. It was just a prank and I had planned on telling him the next morning but it slipped my mind. I didn`t think about it again till months later when I overheard him boasting about it when he was instant messaging some cat out in Denver. I`ve kept him in the dark on that one since.
I put on a playlist and let it loop and went to bed at 2AM.I don`t know what time the party ended, but Buster slept till noon the next day. He told me that day that a good time was had by all, then he stunned me. He thanked me for helping out. The first time he`s ever thanked me for anything. Seems a lot of the other cats confided that their humans would never put up with a cat bash like that. I think he was actually proud of me.
Hope your holiday was as good as ours......later.

Autographed Photos

Buster and I just got back home from Bugtussle airport where we saw the crew from "Mobile Home Quarterly" off. It was a hectic three days while they were here at Damnfarm. Buster is totally exhausted, everytime he tryed to nap he was awakened by one of the crew wanting a comment , pose for a picture, or an autograph. I too am somewhat worn down by the experience. We decided, after some discussion, on the way home from the airport that this would be the final time that we would consent to interviews or permit photographers or film crews here at Damnfarm. Now don`t everyone get excited, this does`nt mean that Buster and I won`t continue to be " balls to the wall" a major part of the "Blogesphere". It has nothing to do with our fans, we love our fans, it`s just that Buster needs some time out of the spotlight to be a normal tomcat. The pressure of being "on" all the time will drive him back into the dark world of catnip and kitty treats. None of us want to see that , so I`ve hired a public relations firm from Los Angeles to field Busters` email and phone calls. Rest assured that this is only temporary, when Busters` medical team is confident that he can handle the pressure direct contact with the fans will be restored. In the meantime autographed pictures of Buster and I will be made available at the reduced price of $19.95 , these photos are normally $39.95. This sale was Busters idea, I tryed to talk him out of this. I said " Dammit Buster do think this Blog runs for free?" To no avail. Act now, the first 50 orders will also recieve a sample of Busters fur as a bonus, there are tons of it here at damnfarm, may contain DNA.
We feel compelled to acknowledge one of our most ardent fans in this post. Michelle. She has been essential in keeping Buster a part of the
"Pop Culture" and the success that he enjoys today.

Better Homes and Gardens?

No, but "Mobile Home Quarterly"has somehow heard of the improvements here at "Damnfarm" and have requested a a photo shoot and interview with Buster and I. As you may have guessed, Buster is very excited. He`s been rubbing and licking everything like he never has before and has been dropping hints about how he needs a new litter box and an addition built on his "Kitty Condo". We`ve agreed to permit photos in all but the most sensitive areas here on the farm and the interview will be totally unrestricted, Buster and I have decided that every topic will be on the table. Buster was very reluctant to permit his addiction and time in rehab to be brought up but after I explained to him how he owed it to his blogger fans and how his story may save another the same fate he came onboard immediately. That gets him everytime, anything for the fans. I believe he`d lick his ass right in front of company for "the fans". I told him it probably wouldn`t come up anyway since they were coming to take pics of the doublewide and some history of "Damnfarm" for an article in their magazine. Eversince his interview in "Tomcat After Dark" and how everything he said was taken out of context and made him appear to be pro-castration he`s been very leary of the press.

Will keep you posted.........

I Heart Nurses

Hello readers, WVMan has been hospitalized for most of the past week. You guessed it.........heart attack. Seems WVMan not on the proper diet, exercise routine. Smoking and drinking seems to be considered somewhat of an issue as well. Blogging didn`t come up so I intend to continue this rather benign activity, so everyone can all exhale now! I feel fine, just a bit sore in the groin area from the angioplasty procedure that has repaired WVMans right coronary artery. Everyone that already has one may now apply your WVMan Lives!! bumper stickers. Buster made it through the ordeal fine though I had a hard time finding someone to look after him while I was away, WVMan has to get out more.
Many thanks to the Doctors and Nurses at Beckley VAs` ICU and Durham VAs` CCU. Professionals each and everyone.

Spring Break

After an unusually warm winter here in the mountains, Buster and I are debating on where to go for our annual spring break. Our travel agent had us scheduled for New Orleans since last year but Buster has nixed that. Busters`bussiness agent wants us to go back out to California again but as I told Buster all she ever thinks about is Busters`career and her 10%. After being cooped-up here at Damnfarm all winter I would really like to get away and do a little bass fishing. I`m thinking I might head over to Paduka, Kentucky. I know that don`t sound very glamorous but the fishing is really great and never ending entertainment from the populace. Everyone dummer`n a bag of hammers, but know how to party. Just what I need, and let she and Buster tour the Left Coast. It`s still undecided but the more I think about it the better I feels, a mini-vacation away from Buster and bass fishing too. Will try to keep you up-to-date, meanwhile enjoy your springtime........

...........my bell

It`s been a long time since I last posted and I am sorry from the bottom of my heart for the neglect that my readers have had to endure. I will not attempt to make excuses, it`s sheer lazyiness on my part.I feel much better now that I`ve taken full responsibility for my actions, or rather for my lack of action.
Just a word in my defense, I`ve had the home improvment project from hell going on here at Damnfarm. On top of that trying to keep Buster on the straight and narrow, i`m about at my wits end.I guess he`s just going through an adolesent period. Ever since this winter when he found out why they`re called Pussy Cats he`s been a handful. Being woken up nightly with the Catterwalling has my nerves on end. To top it all off the drywall sanding, painting, tile, hardwood,carpet and just everyday living has me on the edge. Damn the neighbors, I`ve come a rats ass of calling the boys in white over at the nervous hospital myself.

Whats Love Got to do With it?

It`s been a tuff week here at Damnfarm. Buster has been a real beast since Valentines Day, I`ve done everything I can to console him. Seven days of staying right with him, I only do it because he`d do the same for me. Just like he did time before last when the neighbors had the people from the nervous hospital take us in for tests.
Three days we were over there before they cut us loose. That`s all over now. Buster and I have papers saying we`re sane and we keep them handy too. Buster had his laminated, I just keep mine in a drawer with my stash so I can remember where it is.
Anyhoo, Buster was stood-up . It was really tramatic for him even though I had set him down earlier that week and explained to him that black cats are bad luck. He sat out on the deck 6 hours with his wild flowers and a dozen treats that he had put back since MLK day.
Well it just broke his little kitty heart when the black bitch didn`t show.I let him have several treats but it wasn`t working. I took control and brought him to bed with me. As I said he`s been a beast.

Busters` Valentine

Martin Luther King Day here at Damfarm was going along as it does each year, Buster and I slept in. Didn`t roll out to get the festivites started till 10:30 AM, I made coffee and got Busters` breakfast of Turkey`n Gravy ready and while he was digging in I had coffee spiked with Southern Comfort what with it being a national holiday and all. I got settled in to have my coffee, watching the birds flock around the feeder. I was enjoying the tranquility of the morning when Buster flipped on the TV and started scanning channels. I admit that I was a bit perturbed but just let it go, tolerance is a virtue I`ve come to know well these last few years. I knew he was looking for a parade, nothing on TV that he likes better than a holiday parade. I tried to tell him that I didn`t think a parade was scheduled for MLK day. He flipped around the channels several times before I finally got him to leave it on a Sponge Bob episode it was the one where Squidward trys to have as much imagination as Patrick and Sponge Bob. I`m getting away from the real story with that, just pretend it didn`t happen and we`ll move on. After Buster and I had our traditional fried chicken and watermellon I headed to the deck for a smoke and to let Buster catch a breath of fresh air. I was about to head back in when my eye caught a glimpse of something shiney reflecting the suns rays at the far edge of the yard. I walked out there to investigate the anomally only to discover it to be a shard of glass from a long broken, and discarded beer bottle. I looked at it for quite a long time, absolutely envolved in the way the sunlight caused it to shine. A cloud passed overhead and ruined the moment, probably for the best, the last thing Buster and I needed was the neighbors calling the people over at the nervous hospital, again. I picked up the shard to add to my collection ,turned to head back in and stopped , frozen with shock to see a black female feline and Buster cavorting right there on the deck. My first thought was to put Buster inside then my tolerance training took over, realized that it was Busters` perogative to celebrate MLK day as he saw fit. They were both rubbing together and sticking there noses into cat parts that will remain unmentioned in this blog. I walked the perimeter of the yard keeping my distance so as not to spoil the moment and headed around the house to go in the front door. I looked back at the two of them a final time before I lost sight of them. I`d swear I saw Buster wink but it happened so quick that I just can`t be sure. I had a wing and a leg and another slice of watermellon and tried to watch a little TV but the howling from the deck was just too distracting so I turned it off and went on to bed early. Buster came in and crawled in bed at about 3AM. He was asleep before his tale was tucked in the way he likes it. I tucked it in for him cause I know he`d do the same for me were the paw in the other shoe. Come back to visit again soon. Valentines day is not that far off and love is in the air, at least I think thats` what that smell is.

New Years Day

What a night, I`ve been up all night at the vet with Buster. No cause for alarm though, the vet assured me that Buster is going to be OK. He just wants to keep him a few days for observation. It all started last night at about 7 o`clock. I had been nursing 3 or 7 Jimmy Beams since about 3 in the afternoon, with most of that time trying to answer e-mails from some of our fans and hadn`t paid much attention to Buster. At about 7:30 I got some Rolling Stones streaming, turned off the monitor, cranked it up and went to the living room after getting a fresh Beam, of course. Buster was behaving a bit frisky then but I didn`t think it was anything out of the ordinary. By that time " Beast of Burden " was playing and I had worn out that Beam and needed a new one so went to make one. Buster lead the way and let me know in no uncertain terms that he wanted one of his bags of catnip that he had gotten for Christmas from one of his fans from out in California. I thought " What the hell, it`s New Years Eve " so after I had made myself a fresh Beam n`coke, of course, I got in the cabinet where all of Busters` goodies are kept and got out a bag of that preemo west coast catnip and put it down on Busters` favorite chair and leaned back to enjoy the "Jimmy". Buster got on that bag like "white on rice". Buy then" Angie " was cranking, when it ended I had to backup and play "Beast of Burden" again. It`s Busters favorite "Stones" toon and he insisted I play it again and when he`s spaced out on catnip there`s no use in arguing with him. I learned a long time ago that when he`s tripping out to just let him have his way. Buster and I had a great New Years Eve, by the time the new year rang in we had listened to about everything the "Stones" had ever done and
"Beast of Burden" about 10 times. Throughout the evening I noticed that Buster would disappear now and then, but I thought he was just going to his litter box. When `06 began we high fived and promised each other to make this our best blogging year ever. Of course, after that I made a new Beam `n Coke, the first one of the new year, so made it a double. I was working on that one and listening to "Waiting on a Friend" when it occured to me that Buster had been gone an unusually long time so I went to look for him, after I finished that double, of course. I found him next to the cabinet where his stash is kept, spralled out with all 4 feet straight up and 5 bags of that killer catnip lying all about. I knew right away that when I got a bag out for him earlier in the evening that I had forgotten to close the door on the cabinet, and he had been ringing in the new year all night, big time.
Well I picked him up and pulled on his whiskers to wake him up and keep him awake and got the vets` emergency number dailed, he said to bring him to the clinic and he would meet me there as soon as he could get on his smock and shoes. He didn`t have to say it but I knew he wouldn`t come out in the middle of the night like that for just any tomcat, he too, like everyone else is crazy `bout ole Buster and knows how special he is.
Well, to make a long blog short, I`ve been sitting in the waiting room down there since 10 after 1, worried sick over Buster and feeling guilty, this isn`t the first time hes` OD`ed on catnip, he spent 3 months in de-tox back in 2002, but this is the only time that I`m to blame for it. Anyway don`t worry I`m sure he`ll be back and blogging by the end of the week. Get well cards and words of encouragment can be E-ed from our blog-sites. I wish you all a great new year and I`m sure that goes double from Buster.

Santa Finally Showed

After flying over Damnfarm without so much as a nod for the last 5 Christmas`es the raindeer sat down on the roof last night. I`ve had to contract a roofing contractor to repair the damage, but that`s neither here nor there. Buster was so excited that Santa had come, I guess it`s worth whatever the cost. Buster and I had turned in early Christmas Eve after turkey, dressing, corn, green beans, yams and pumkin pie and 6 or 10 Black Russians. Buster was up early Christmas morning and raised such a ruckus that woke me up . I just layed there in bed for a while thinking of ways to skin a cat, they say there`s more than one way but right then I was only thinking of the quickest. Buster continued to insist so reluctanly I got up , made a valient attempt to slip into my sweat pants, but it was a no go. I had one of my morning woodies and had to sit on the edge of the bed and think about fire trucks till it went away. Finally was able to squeeze into my baggies and headed for the coffee maker when I too saw that Santa Claus had come to Damnfarm. I got a new half-gallon of Jim Beam, a decanter of Disaronno, and a Red Ryder BB Gun. You`ve got to wonder
"What the hell was Santa thinking." Buster got some new fake mice, a Kitty Condo, a 10 pound bag of Friskes, and some treats. As I made coffee and watched Buster bat his new mice around, I reflected back on when Buster came to Damnfarm 4 years ago. He was smaller then, but not a kitten and for those of you who may have wondered, Buster arrived at Damnfarm balless. Can`t blame that one on me, the people that had him when he was a kitten are responsible for that. They meant well, got Buster for their little boy, he was too young and Buster too wild. There was no chance of them connecting, hope they got the boy a dog. Hope your dreams are fulfilled this great day as are me and Busters`. Merry Christmas faithful readers.

Buster on Point

Buster Marking his Gifts

Christmas at Damnfarm

2 Hammered 2 Blog

Have been drinking for several days now,intended to sleep last nite but it just didn`t work out. The booze won out over sleep. It`s about an hour before the sun comes up, if I can hold out till then the plan is to switch to screwdrivers at least untill noonish. Like to take care of myself get my USDA requirment of vitimen C. Yesterday when I was pumping some 16oz tall boys getting in shape for the upcoming winter games, Buster out of nowhere hopped up on my lap and asked when are we going on that road-trip that we had discussed back in the summer. The plan then was to fill up the coolers with Coors and Friskies and get out there, travel across the country and meet some of the fans. Maybe see the Grand Canyon, a week or two in Vegas before pushing on Westward to California where Buster has his largest fan base. His intention was to do several public appearances in LA and San Diago, some blog signings maybe even an appearance on Animal Channel. But, alas, we got so busy keeping up with our blogs, then the field mice debackle. Buster was as busy as a cat covering up sh....oops you know what I mean. If you know Buster or any of his kin you are aware of how headstrong they are.It took quite a bit of convincing and a can of Bonkers to get him to see it my way but we were finally able to agree that we would get out of the mountains, head down south, catch some rays avoid our fans and just relax and recharge our batteries. Head back home after the holidays refreshed and ready to blog. If you to are down south in the next 3-4 weeks and recognize Buster and I don`t hesitate to ask for an autograph.Even though this is going to be a getaway for us our fans are never far from our hearts and minds. Happy Holidays faithful readers and bloggers alike.

Catfish or Pocket Trout?

Winter`s here in Southern West Virginia, the first inch of snow of the season fell last night. Buster and I stayed up late to watch the tiny flakes buffetted about by the wind. Brilliantly reflected in the dusk `til dawn light here at Damfarm ,framed in the blackness beyond that is winters` canvas. I don`t think Buster enjoyed it as much as I did but he didn`t have nearly as much Jim Beam as myself. I find that I`m easily entertained after Scotty beams me up. `Tis the season.
As I stood there in the dim glow my mind drifted back to warmer times, and the biggest catfish I`d ever boated, a 37" 22 lb Channel Cat.A marvel of natures` handywork.....Then I snapped out of it!!! There with both hands in my pockets I realized I was hooked up to one of largest, ornriest pocket trout in ten counties. With unpure thoughts of Ansted Alice racing in my head I damn`near stepped on Buster in a mad dash to get a cold shower and another Beam`n coke before falling to sleep on the davenport. {actually it`s a couch but doesn`t davenport make it somehow seem classier}.To further make my point ,I`ll give you three examples and you decide for yourself. "That f*#%in cat is shredding the couch"..........."That f#*^in cat is shredding the davenport"..........."That f#*$in cat is shredding the davan". Can it be any clearer?With that settled perhaps sleep will come a bit easier tonite. Before Buster and I go we would like to wish each and everyone of our fans a Merry Christmas.

Buster & Bill

Terrell the Terapin

A visitor arrived here at Damnfarm Satuday, Terrell the terapin showed up in the back yard. He`s the only terapin to visit Damnfarm since I`ve lived here. Of course he was invited to spend the night, got a cardboard box for him and brought him inside. Buster was very excited, as he`d never met a terapin before. He did`nt come with a name so was quickly labeled Terrell, it seemed to fit him . If he had a problem with it he never let on about it. Terrell spent the first 3 hours in his shell, probably resting after his trip. After his initial excitement Buster soon lost interest in our visitor. Later that evening we all sat around watching Animal Planet , I had a Coors Light, no one else wanted anything, I offered to pop a bowl of popcorn to go around but no one spoke up so I just let it go. I had 2 or 12 of them Silver Bullets before turning in, after it became apparent that Terrell, or Buster for that matter, was in a party mood. Everyone rested well and was up early this morning, Buster had some breakfast but Terrell did`nt want anything and was eager to get back on the road. So we got all his things together and took him to the back yard where we said our goodbyes. Buster and I waved bye to Terrell as he sat off on the rest of his journey. I never did find out where he was going, he was`nt a big talker. All in all I think he enjoyed his visit at Damnfarm. We may never see Terrell again but Buster and I will always think of him fondly when we recall the Saturday night he spent with us. Click Frank the Terrapin

How `bout a Fish Story

May 31,1976.....4:30AM It was a great morning, the wind was still, the only sounds where those of the animals, insects, the occassional fish splashing as it fed on hapless bugs. I got the boat launched, truck and trailor parked in the designated area it was`nt hard to find a spot as I was the only one there. As I walked down to the dock it struck me as to how dark this morning was, no moon and heavy fog. No matter I had my own private lake, at least for that morning.
As I untied and shoved off, got the electric motor in the water, realized I could`nt see beyond the bow of the boat. Fumbled through the storage box for my Q-Beam, something like a half million candle power, the boat and I drifted aimlessly in the still morning water of Plum Orchard Lake. A small man-made impoundment of about 750 acres in Fayette County,West Virginia. First opened to the public in 1963, I remember that because that was the same year I graduated from high school. It was largely built by unemployed men of the area under the charge of the WPA purely for recreational purposes. The Eisenhower years had been very hard on the coal miners of southern West Virginia, so there where plenty of men on the unemployment rolls for the project.
I finally got the Q-Beam hooked up and ready. turned it on aimed it into the fog. If you`ve ever driven on a foggy night and tryed your high beams then you can imagine what the Q-Beam did. I turned it off, needed time to let my eyes ajust to the darkness again, not because I could might see any better but just for the comfort of the blackness without the bright white dots.
By this time I had lost my bearings completely and was becoming impatient with the situation. By God I had come to fish not float around in the dark waiting for the sun to come up. Turned on the motor and held it straight ahead, had to come to shore eventually.
Well I did with a scraping sound that seemed way to loud and unnatural in the still West Virginia morning. No real harm done though, got the boat tied to a small sapling.
Checked my watch, figured it would be better than an hour before the sun was up enough to navagate to my "hot spots" so I got my newest rod and reel out of the boat. The rod was named,I shit you not, "ugly stick" the medium action version, 6 footer made by Fenwick. Real nice, about 25 1960`s dollars worth of nice.
The reel an "ambassador 5000" by Abu Garcia, a bait caster for those who are not fishin` nuts it`s the type that looks like a miniture wench. They are difficult to master as they are prone to back-lash and you will spend a lot of time picking "birds nests" out of your line before you get the hang of it. It was a perfect opportunity to get in some practice time with it. I went through the tackle box and tied on the largest of my plugs, a sputterbug a surface lure,very noisey when pulled fast on the water in short bursts of speed.
I moved close to the waters edge and began to fan cast, casting into the darkness as far as possible. Letting the lure rest for a moment after striking the water then pulling it fast on the surface 3 to 4 feet. Hearing it, well, sputter on the still dark water, then letting it remain motionless for 30-40 seconds before giving it another mighty jerk. I knew that any large mouths in the area would see it, they might not strike it which is often the case, but by golly it would be hard to ignore on a morning so quiet. I must have made 50-60 casts like that right in a row, the ole sputterbug had the water talkin`by then. Lets say for the sake of argument and because after all this is a fishin`story, on cast 59 there I said it "cast 59" the ole sputterbug had been floating there motionless for about the percieved length of time, I was just about to send it sputtering again, like some injured creature that was making a dying final effort to get out of water. The line tightened up, the rod bent like a willow and an enormous splash broke the darkened stillness and yea haw the battle was on!
I could`nt see it but knew from the strenght of the runs it made that it was a big one. After 4 valient runs and much splashing it was close enough to the shore to lip it.{a time honored methold of subduing a thrashing bass, thumb in the mouth,2-3 fingers to grasp the lower jaw with}. I lifted it from the water and was amazed at the weight of it.
I was thrilled beyond dicription, it was clearly a dream fish. The kind of dream a fishin`nut might have in the dead of a frozen West Virginia winter after cleaning and oiling reels at the dinner table with newspapers on it to keep the peace so to speak. As it turned out the picture of it weighted 5 lbs, no just kidding but I just love that joke and could`nt resist using it here. Really though it was 24 inches long and 7lbs 6oz a beautiful creature and the biggest one I had ever caught and to this day still is. If I could have that glorious morning back, I would release that old large mouth back into it`s watery home. I was different back then and so was the world. Elvis still walked among us, a mouse was really a mouse, if anyone had a search engine it was surely in a piece of Detroit iron that was driven to the A&P on a quest for those yet to be eatable TV dinners, and no one could yet fathom a mulicolored terror alert. Neither could anyone have known that a young draft dodger down there in Texas would one day be president and save the wealthy from certain desitution and lead the rest of us into the biggest fiasco of our nations history.
I had that big ole large mouth mounted and displayed her proudly for many years. I am somewhat guilty now that I did`nt give her the freedom to swim her final years in the clear clean beautiful mountain water of Plum Orchard Lake.
There it is, the story of the biggest Large Mouthed Bass I ever caught. Note the time and place of your reading this story, it will remain with you for many years, so in some odd way so can I.
Have a great rest of the day!

May `76

7lb 6oz Large Mouth Bass

Plum Orchard Lake..near Pax,WV

Cannellton,WV{near Montgomery}..1991

Big Buster Enjoying the Day Off

He really is a good boy, when I first saw him I thought " My god what an ugly cat".Since I had already committed to taking him sight unseen, I did and now he`s grown on me. Would`nt trade him any ole fancy cat.
I give him one day a week off from his housecattin`duties and let him do whatever he wants. He usually naps alot on his day off, guess he`s pretty tired from workin` all week.
If I`ve done this right you should be able to link over to his blog by clicking on the title of this post..............Thanks for coming along for the ride and dagnabit leave comments.

First Post

Welcome to WV man.....don`t yet know what to do with this blog, got things to do right now will get back soon, kill some time..........